Tuesday, 13 August 2013

Flirting Tip, The Power of a Smile

Smile Smile Smile

“There was a girl sitting in the cafeteria from the year below me. She was reading and suddenly she smiled at something in the book. It was a wicked secret smile, like she knew something the rest of us didn’t. I think I fell in love with her at that moment.”

I did a poll of boys this week. they were 15, 16 and 17 years old.

For the single boys I asked what would attract you to a girl?  The answers were varied and of course several crude, but joking aside almost every one said the same thing: they were looking for a girl who was fun to be with.

Digging a bit deeper into what that meant, it meant they didn’t want a girl who was moody, who miserable, who had lots of issues and insecurities.

Of course we all know this is totally unrealistic, what teenage girl doesn’t have insecurities? Who can possibly be happy and laid back all the time? No one! But this isn’t about how to hold a man, this is just how to attract him in the first place, because that’s 90% of the battle isn’t it?

So today’s tip is most definitely to come across as a good laugh. Be non-critical, friendly, try to appear confident (much more on that another day), and above all smile and laugh.

Why smile and laugh? Because half the boys I spoke to were already in relationships. I asked them what attracted them to their current girlfriend?

I had to roll my eyes at some comments about melons and reputations, but when they had done all the obvious innuendos, it wasn’t those things at all.

Again and again I heard “She had such a nice smile” “She smiled at me like I was interesting / funny / the only person in the room”. “She has a fantastic laugh.”

My favourite quote from a boy is the one I started this article with. He says his girlfriend is really quiet and shy and sits on her own a lot reading all the time. It took him six months to work up the courage to ask her out as he was worried she might be too clever and think he was an idiot. Just goes to show you the power of a smile.

Boys get really nervous too. But a nice smile makes you more approachable and less scary. They don’t think you will crush their fragile egos if you are a friendly person. You might say no, but you would do it nicely.

Who wants to be with someone who makes them miserable? Well, actually quite a few guys dig the moody vibe, but most want to make a girl laugh, to see her enjoying his company, it makes them feel ten foot tall.

So give a guy a break. Make him feel special. Give him a glowing smile, go on.

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